Happy Birthday, Snake, I'm glad you enjoyed it. It's hard to believe you've been around for as long as you have. Even though there are times I wanted to trade you in for a puppy, I wouldn't have you any other way but as you are.
I love you lots.
..because they aren't. They are Dark Suckers. Turn on a Dark Sucker and look at the area around it. Go ahead, this will be here when you get back...see how the area closest to the Dark Sucker is brighter than an area farther away? That's because the Dark Sucker is only effective for a certain distance from it. The bigger and more powerful the Dark Sucker is, the more dark it can suck up. And, they don't "burn out", they're just full of dark and need to be replaced.
Get it?
Such an innocent question uttered by Moose at dinner. We went out to eat, and on the wall close to the ceiling were what looked like switch plates. I just couldn't help myself...I felt it starting before I knew what I was doing.
"Ceiling Gnomes. There are gnomes that live and work up there. They get to the switch by taking out the light fixture and then they use tools that reach the switch. The Ceiling Gnomes are also in charge of replacing the light bulbs when they go out, too."
I can't help it, things like this just flow from me. What's worse is Smith goes along with it.
Hmmm, the sad thing is I did this without coffee. I got 147 clicks in 30 seconds...but I'm still not awake.
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Things have changed some around the Smith home. I'm working again. I was taking the summer off from my job at the Day Care, but I got a call asking me to come back. It turns out the woman my friend got to cover me during the summer wasn't working out and the older kids, as well as one of her own kids, asked if she would call me and ask me to come back in. The preschoolers were asking where I was, too.
When I showed up last week, I was mobbed and given the biggest group hug I've ever been given. It was a lovely feeling. The older kids did the whole fist pump in the air thing, that was just as cool.
My guys are adjusting to the change. They know the reason behind it. And they know that come the start of the new school year, I'm going to be looking for a different job. We have plans to improve our lives, and my guys are adaptable and resilient and supportive. I am very proud of how they can roll with the changes that are presented to them, and turn to us for help when things seem too much for them. Amazing family makes a difference, as well. My parents are rocks in my children's lives. And my MIL is great, too
Loss. If you've been reading for a while, you know we lost Smith's Gramma. She was a lovely woman who accepted me and Snake with open arms. I loved my Grandmothers, and wrestled with feelings of them thinking I was betraying their memories by accepting Gramma the way I did. My Mom said, "No", they would understand. I hope so, because I loved them dearly.
My Sister-In-Law lost her Grandfather recently. I am sad for her loss, but lad she had the chance to have him in her life for so long. I hope she's gone for the funeral when this posts. I love my SIL, and want her to be happy. She and my Brother are a great pair. They are a wonderful couple who grow closer every year, and I hope they will always stay that way.
She and my Brother have come through big-time lately, they know what I'm talking about. My kids think their uncle is a cool guy, and Snake says, "He's got damn good cooking skills". (Comment sanctioned). Moose loved the mohawk my Brother gave him. Smith thinks he's a neat guy, too. And, just for the record, for all the fighting we did I love you dearly and wish things could have been different. For all three of us, yes, I have a sister, too.
The learning of just who can be depended on. It's something that I figured out long ago, and is reinforced every time something comes up when family needs to pull together. There seems to be one in every family, whether the family is 4 people or forty. There is usually a person who holds a grudge just because they were born.
That person is never able to let go of the human foibles of the other people in the family. That person refuses to let go of things that happened to them when they were 2 years old. Yes, bad things happened to you, but you weren't the only one. Do you know what people were willing to do to get revenge for you. When you were in jeopardy of losing everything, who did you turn to for help? And then who had to listen to "I just want to have fun", while taking care of another person while YOU ran around trying to ease your sorrow by by destroying a friend's life and a relationship that he'd vested much time in. Then when he decided to break that relationship, you dropped him for someone else. "Fun".Wish I could have floated around on a lake. "I just want to have fun"- read "I want to run around and pretend no one else exists, especially if that person is injured and needs help eating, bathing, and getting dressed. I'm going to be selfish and self-absorbed" "Fun"...it wasn't for the rest of us, you know, those of us who don't have mansions in La-La Land. That word nauseates me to this day.
It is time to let go of all the slights, real or imagined, and join reality.
This post may not be kind. Neither is life. And to quote something you said to someone else on a day they were having something life-changing done: "Have a nice day".
I started this blog on a whim. It's grown since then, letting me get out things semi-anonymously. There are family members who know about it, and others who may not. My problem is this: I have some emotionally volatile statements I want to get out about a family member. Do I let fly full speed ahead, damning the torpedoes since our relationship is already strained? Or, do I continue being diplomatic, and have the backlog of venomous truths I've been holding in continue to eat at me, smiling while choking at the bitter taste in my throat?
There are several people who would urge me to let go of what I feel and forgive the other person. I will counter with this: you have no idea how hard it is to deal with someone who continually treats one of the people I love most in the world like a second class citizen and as little respect as can be gotten away with.
I NEED to get out what I'm feeling inside in a public, yet somewhat anonymous way. I need to get feedback from the people who drop by my little corner of Blogland. At the same time, I don't want to make it worse for those I deeply care about and love.
Thus is my conundrum. If you have a long reply, feel free to email me.
I listen to all kinds of music. These are two of my favorites from my teen years. They're also the first tracks on a CD I burned for the car. Yes, Snake and Moose know the words to them. Hearing Moose sing "Little Bastard" is hysterical. You should have been around to hear them laughing to the second song. I'll let you hear it.
And, please, I know these probably aren't the most appropriate thing for them to listen to, it still beats most of the crud on the radio.
Enjoy. (Not responsible for damage to screen if drinking).
